Recently I have been battling a lot of inner demons within myself that a lot people would never believe. On the outside, I’m the girl who is a daughter, sister, Tia, cousin, fiancé, coworker, and honestly a friend. I’m always willing to try to make someone laugh and smile. Sometimes, however, it can be difficult to play those roles. My anxiety plays a major part in this as I suffer from it greatly since high school.
However, I’m always there willing to listen to someone who is going through a difficult time, someone who is having a milestone in life, or someone who just simply wants to talk. But with my inner demon battles it can get difficult to be able to function.
Some mornings I wake up straight out of my sleep with a feeling of terror of the unknown. I know from a psychological stand point there is no way to control this but I have come to realize it is my body’s way to state that I can’t operate on autopilot. I have come to realize to let go and listen to my body reactions and today was a perfectly example.
Today, my fiancé Michael presented at the ExLPR Summit as a patient health advocate, spreading awareness for migraines and Churg Strauss. This morning all I could think was how it was gonna go for him as he was traveling with his mom and I couldn’t go due to work. I kept think how he was gonna handle what was gonna happened and in the end he did amazing. I’m so proud of Michael and he inspire me and others everyday to do better for ourselves. Today was another perfect example and if he could do that I could fight my stupid anxiety.